Secrets of Clever Speakers
We need to talk to someone. However, we just do not know how to begin. Or sometimes we are too afraid that the problem gets
worse. Finally we decide to remain silent. We hope that time will cure.
We need to talk to someone. However, we just do not know how to begin. Or sometimes we are too afraid that the problem gets
worse. Finally we decide to remain silent. We hope that time will cure.Amir, a teacher at an afternoon course feels terrible of Haryo’s – his colleague – habit. Both get along well before. The problem is recently Haryo does not clean up the board after using it. It takes place on and on for almost one term. Next, Amir changes his attitude toward Haryo. He becomes cold that Haryo at last can feel the difference.
Haryo commented,” We never chat anymore like we used to. I sometimes hope that we be in sorts of situations.”
Amir replied no single word. Yet, deep inside his heart, he wants Haryo to ask him whether he has done something harm to Amir. Amir himself feels it will be too risky for him to break the ice. In return, Amir complains to other teacher about Haryo’s deed.
When knowing this, my question is: Will Haryo know what Amir wants if Amir doesn’t tell Haryo?
It is not true that we are always recommended to verbalize our thought to others. Yet it is also a mistake if we think that we can never talk to others no matter how stubborn they are. Our will to open our mouth or to lock it up surely depends on many considerations. I guess it reminds us to saying: silent is golden. Daily experiences show us several people who are not skillful enough to be either the problem presenters or the listeners. In the contrary, we frequently prove that after opening our mouth, we often find the problems get worse. Consequently, people often read others’ attitude to judge how secure their relationships are. This way has its own risk. How do we suppose to know when we bring about some trouble if our friends are good at hiding their feelings? How do others know that we want them to ask for an apology if we are too elegant in our daily behavior?
We should never expect others will know what we really want if we don’t inform them. If we do so, I suggest that we make friends with a genius or a clairvoyant only. The followings are some tips to express what we want, to communicate ourselves and to listen to others’ needs.
